A bedtime routine is a few familiar steps that lead towards bed. Choose steps your family can repeat on an ordinary evening, and leave room for the help your child needs. An elaborate routine is not a requirement.
Choose the essentials
Start with what already needs to happen: washing, teeth, pyjamas and time together. Add a book, song or recording if your child enjoys it. Decide which steps belong earlier, such as a long bath or an evening meal.
Talk through the order during the day. For a preschooler, a small picture list can help show what comes next without repeating every instruction.
An example for a preschooler
- Finish active play and screens earlier in the evening.
- Use the bathroom, wash and brush teeth with adult help.
- Put on pyjamas and get comfortable.
- Have a cuddle or a short chat, then choose between two stories.
- Finish the story and offer the reassurance your child needs.
A toddler may need you to do most of these steps with them. An older child might choose their own book and want a few minutes to talk privately. Keep the order useful rather than insisting every age follows the same script.
Give small choices within the routine
“Blue pyjamas or green?” is easier to answer than “Are you ready for bed?” Likewise, deciding between two books can be simpler than searching a whole shelf. Make the options ones you are comfortable following through on.
If you need a compact version, try this 15-minute wind-down sequence. The timing covers the steps, not a deadline for falling asleep.
Work out what is making bedtime difficult
Look for a specific problem: a late or changing nap, a story that runs too long, an uncomfortable room or a child who wants more company. Adjust that part before replacing the entire routine.
If bedtime remains consistently difficult, keep a short note of sleep and wake times and discuss it with your child’s health professional. A routine can organise an evening, but it does not resolve every cause of poor sleep.
Return to the familiar steps after disruption
Travel, illness and family events can interrupt the pattern. When things settle, start again with the parts your child recognises. If different adults handle bedtime, share the order and the usual story ending so each person does not need to invent a new plan.